ACADEMIA DE MEDIOCRITATE

est. 1965

π certificates issued to date — counted by W. Jones.

WE MAKE THINGS UNTHINGS.

The world's premier institution dedicated to the strategic preservation of the status quo. We don't believe in disruption. We believe in the committee.

OUR EXPERTISE:

Reverse-Engineering Potential: Turning revolutions into PowerPoints since 1965.
Strategic Hesitation: Teaching the art of "Let's circle back."
Simulated Productivity: How to look busy in open-space offices.
Minimum Viable Involvement: How to take credit without taking responsibility.

THE 7 DEGREES OF MEDIOCRITY

From Apprentice to Illuminated Master.
No exams. No effort. Just like real life.

[ CHOOSE YOUR DEGREE ]

[ AWARD SOMEONE ELSE ]

(Passive-aggressive gifting since 1965)

MATHEMATICALLY PROVEN MEDIOCRITY

William Jones, FRS (1675–1749)

Welsh mathematician. First to use π as a symbol.
Now serving as our unofficial Head of Irrational Accounting.

"All bribes are indexed to π, as he first popularized it. He gave humanity the symbol; we gave it absolutely no practical use. This number is irrational. So are our donors."